If we can find the money to kill people, we can find the money to help people.
Tony Benn (via rorschachx)
Sir Richard Wharton (RW; Permanent Secretary to the Foreign Office): It’s too dangerous to let politicians become involved with diplomacy.
Sir Humphrey Appleby (HA): Diplomacy is about surviving until the next century. Politics is about surviving until Friday afternoon.
RW: There are 157 independent countries in the world. We’ve dealt with them for years. There’s hardly an MP who knows anything about any of them.
HA: Tchh… Show them a map of the world; most of them have a job finding the Isle of Wight.
Bernard Woolley (BW): Surely, politicians can’t be that ignorant.
RW: Ha ha ha… very well, sit down Bernard.
RW: Where is the Upper Volta?
BW: Umm…
HA: What is the capital of Chad?
BW: Mmmmm
RW: What language do they speak in Mali?
BW: Ummmm…
HW: Who is the president of Perú?
BW: Ummmm…
RW: What is the national religion of Cameroon?
BW: Ummm….
HA: Bernard!
BW: Yes?
HA: You should stand for parliament!

We got to Oxford in little over an hour. The M40 is a very good road. So is the M4, come to think of it … I pointed out that the M11 has only just been completed. “Don’t Cambridge colleges give you a good dinner?” “Of course”, said Bernard, “but it’s years and years since the Department of Transport had a Permanent Secretary from Cambridge.”

We got to Oxford in little over an hour. The M40 is a very good road. So is the M4, come to think of it … I pointed out that the M11 has only just been completed. “Don’t Cambridge colleges give you a good dinner?”
“Of course”, said Bernard, “but it’s years and years since the Department of Transport had a Permanent Secretary from Cambridge.”

The three most unreliable things in public life: Political Memoirs, Official Denials and Manifesto Promises.
Words to live by
Hacker: Do you mean to tell me, that when the chips are down, you're on MY side, not Humphrey's?
Bernard: Minister, it's my job to see the chips stay up.

<…> Yes Minister co-creator Jonathan Lynn became interested in satire after meeting young politicos at Cambridge University: “They … were the most pompous, self-satisfied, self-important bunch of clowns that I’ve ever clapped eyes on.… I thought at that point that the only way that I could ever contribute to politics is making fun of the politicians.” <…>

Jim Hacker: Why is it that ministers can't ever go anywhere without their briefs?
Bernard: It's in case they get caught with their trousers down.
brianjohnspencer:

"The sad final truth is that it doesn’t matter how hard you hit politicians — most are so arrogant, they would rather be drawn as a warthog than not drawn at all."
- Gerald Scarfe

brianjohnspencer:

"The sad final truth is that it doesn’t matter how hard you hit politicians — most are so arrogant, they would rather be drawn as a warthog than not drawn at all."

- Gerald Scarfe

Once you start interfering in the internal squabbles of other countries, you’re on a very slippery slope. Even the Foreign Secretary’s grasped that.

/adiv class=span style=